THE 60/40 RELATIONSHIP RULE

Photo by Park Troopers on Unsplash

We are all used to the Pareto Principle’s 80/20 rule which explains that 80% of the result we get comes from 20% of our input. This means that out of all you do, only 20% of that will give you the 80% of the result you eventually get. This rule appears to give people especially managers and entrepreneurs some kind of relief and direction regarding where and how to direct their energy for maximum result.

I am here to introduce you to a rule I created which I hope will help you in your relationship with people and I call that 60/40 relationship rule. It states that once a person is 60% good, we can ignore their 40% errors.

I must admit that I learn this from a friend more than 7 years ago and it had since been so helpful for me.

Now, how does it work?

We must realize that no one is perfect, we say this often but we usually find it difficult to implement. Once people ‘misbehave’, we immediately label them with that error and forget the tons of good they might have done in the past.

So, what the principle implies is that once someone is 60% good, close your mind and accept they are good. No more questions. Like you, they will always fall short, but if you remember they only have to be 60% good to be good, then you will have peace, they will have peace and the society will be a peaceful place for us all to live.

Like you, they will have the freedom to exercise their weakness for the remaining 40% while maintaining their goodness card with you.

How you measure it is all up to you but once you decide to do it, you will discover that most people around you are good. This will decline the level of intolerance and help to ensure that we all give ourselves excuses and live in peace.

But if by your standard of measurement, someone falls short below 50%, you may want to admonish the person or avoid them if need be. Despite the importance of tolerance, it pays to sometimes stay clear of toxic people.

But, I bet you, no much of the people close to you will fall below 50%. If most of them do, then you may want to check yourself first to be sure that you have the right attitude to attract the right set of people into your circle of relationships.

With this, you will see that the volume of backbiting, slandering, and backstabbing will reduce to the minimum.

If for instance this 60/40 rule is applied in our marital relationship, imagine how tolerant we will be and how the rate of divorce will fall to the minimum.

Use this in your family, your workplace, among your friends, in your neighborhood and you will see that the level of relationship toxicity will reduce drastically.

Thanks for reading

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Abdulrafiu Arikewuyo

Abdulrafiu Arikewuyo is a teacher and a writer. On a mission to change the school model.